Thursday, November 29, 2012

HAIR HAIR HAIR HAIR HAIR HAIR HAIR

When I am walking with my mom and sisters, it is very easy for someone to lump me into a collective, "you have such beautiful girls."  I could be wearing camouflage  holding my trains in one hand and a sign saying "I AM A BOY" in the other and I will still get called a girl.  Yes, I have very nice features, but they are young boy not young girl features.  What makes people think I am a girl is that I have magestic curly long flowing hair.  It is beautiful.  When people see little people with long hair, they think girl.  But I am a boy.  Grr.

So why do I have this coif a kin to a 1983 prog rocker? All because of that great Jewish Torah Tradition. There is a practice called upsherin, shearing off in Yiddish. Upsherin calls for a boy to not have his hair cut until he is three years old. I am like a beautiful short redwood. I am watered and given light and sustenance (water, love, food). Eventually, I will be the tallest tree in our forest (family) but right now, I am still the world's tallest sapling (a two year old). Jewish law says that a farmer is to leave a newly planted tree unharvested for it's first three years as a gift to G-d. This is why I have not had my hair cut. Getting my hair cut will be a celebration. It will be a step forward where I will no longer be a baby. I will be ready to harvest. That sounds weird. So, sometime in February, probably the 9th, I will have my hair cut for the first time. The big question is what style should I go with? That is where I need all your help. 

So, for the time being, I will look like a little Fabio.  Which is not that bad.  

Felgate, have a better day tomorrow.


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Mr. Sandman, Lend me a Train... Do Do Do Do....

Hello Ashfans,  I hope that Buyer's Remorse Tuesday has been treating you fine and that all of your Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, and Cyber Monday purchases were not just impulse buys.  Mom and Dad do not know that I know, but I know that they bought a Soda Stream half off on CM.  I saw the payment when I was trolling their account looking for fraud.  Just something I do for them since they let me crash all by my lonesome in a big room.  I am still a little confused why they are trying to get me out of my three sided transformer crib/toddler bed which I call Matressmus Prime and into my Thomas-Linened Big Boy Bed (TLB3).  Yes, I know that it is for the baby, but to be truthful, I still think that Mom's belly button is the baby.


So since I started talking about beds, I wanted to let you guys and gals in on a secret.  I have found the best and most comfortable way to sleep, ever!  Different people in my family have different thoughts on how to have a great night of sleep.  For Dad, it is facing a wall with one foot out of the covers.  This has to happen or he cannot sleep. When I go and visit them in the night, I like covering his foot and making him wake up almost immediately.  It is funny.

Gillian does not really have a sleeping idiosyncrasy because she is so frantic that by the time she lets herself settle down, she passes out almost immediately.  She squirms around a lot in the wake time though.

Liana was interesting.  When she was little, she would sleep with some stuffed animals.  That is normal.  What was abnormal was that she also needed to sleep on a Baker's Dozen of assorted books.  These were not flat across the bottom of the bed but scattered all nimbly pimbly in the crib.  To add to the "Den of Madness," she slept with an assortment of dreidels.  Plastic, wooden, small, and not so small, they all found their way into this baffling bed.  She eventually outgrew the crib and with it, the books and dreidels.  Now she sleeps with mob of stuffed animals meticulously placed nightly in just the right spots staring at her.

They are all crazy.  I would like to state that I am not.

I choose to sleep with four baby blankets on me,  three stuffed animals at the end of the bed looking away from me, two library books (Thomas, of course) that I sleep on top of, and the piece d'resistance--four to six miniature trains (Little Engine and the car, two circus transport cars, my new bullet train and car from China)--also under me.  I have to be sleeping on these trains.  If I am not, I wake up and start hunting.  Even when I choose to make my parents' night of sleep better by joining them in their bed and kicking or screaming at them, I bring the trains with me.  You should try it.  This is Tots Legit.  I think I have found the holy grail of sleep aids.  Diecast or wooden trains making indentations on your chest as you sleep.  Anybody else doing this?  We should trade trains.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

I am Back!

Hello ladies and gentlemen.  Asher is back.  I know that it has been a few months since my last post so I wanted to just apologize.  Like many people, I did not realize the time commitment school was going to put on me.  Boy, school is a lot of hard work.  I get to play with cars and the train table, paint, have snack, and look cute and awesome.  Yes, I only go two days a week, but the homework is killer.

A lot has changed since August.  Mom is much bigger and tireder.  She is preggo, remember.  Small interlude:   Tonight mom and dad went to the hospital to bring Liana into the world seven years ago.  Wow.  Her birth was not nearly as cool as mine.  She did not want to come out and complications ensued   Me, it was like going down a water slide. But on this water slide, I got to go head first.  Happy birthday, Liana, hope you have a nice one.  I will celebrate your day of birth by not monopolizing dad's tablet, forcing you to play train, or hitting you for not reason with a smile on my face.

Everyone knows that I love my trains. They are my peeps.  I will post in the next days about my love of trains.  Just wanted to say.

So, I got my school picture today.  I want to know what you think.  Let me know.  I love it.

Talk to you all soon.

ASHER!