Thursday, October 15, 2015

Hair! (Not the musical, the stuff growing out of my head)

I come from a family that takes pride in their hair.  My Captain Grandpa Howie has pictures of him with a fro that might put the Jackson 5 to shame.  Speaking of the Jackson 5, my Uncle Jack had big, fat, natural dreadlocks that turned many heads.  My Abba Scott had majestic, long flowing, curly hair that went down his back like a black waterfall trying to find a lake.  There is a picture of him after a hebrew musical production of  Hair where his hair looks massive and impressive.  I will try to find that picture to post.  Robin from camp thinks my dad has awesome hair.  That is the biggest compliment hair can get.  On the other side of my "hair" story is my Mommy-poopy.  She is no hair slouch herself.  She has found this really cool way to make her hair super curly by doing some wacky T-shirt origami thing with her head and when her hair comes out of it, it looks magnificent.  Liana has super thick flowing hair that looks nice in a braid and is easy for me to pull.  Gah-koe, as you can see documented in past posts, had some killer hair before it got cut off the first time when he was three.  I can tell he misses it.  Mommy keeps trying to let his hair grow back, but the grandmas keep stealing him and cutting it. Then there is Gillian whose hair is more golden than anyone else in the family.  I come from a family with great hair.  I would say that we are a hair beyond compare.

Then there is me.  Me and my hair.

To behold my head of hair is to look into the eye of a hairnado.  You can not look directly at my hair or you might go blind.  Albert Einstein and Tim Burton want hair styling tips from me.  My hair is real and it is spectacular.  Shakespeare would write a sonnet about my hair.  Prince was thinking of changing his name to a picture of my hair.  When I walk into a grocery store, all the angel hair pasta falls to the floor.

I have never seen another head of hair like mine.  Let me try to describe it to you.  My hair has never been cut.  When I come out of the shower, my hair is long and wavy.  It is cute, but most toddler hair is cute.  What happens next is awesome.  Watching my hair dry is a thing of magic.  You can see it recoil from its wet state to its dry state.  As it drys it goes up and out.  I develop a todjewfro, (a toddler jewish afro) of super tight bouncy curls that have a mind of their own.  I like to believe that it is the cutest head of hair since the Big Bang.  Not the Tv show mind you, the actual celestial event that created the potential of my hair to exist, and a lot of other things like Carbon, Nitrogen, and Gallium.  (BTW, Gallium is a metal that melts by body heat.  Now you know!)  If I go a day or two between showers, it becomes even more impressive.  It becomes a tight, interconnected hair complex. When I shower, the cycle starts all over again.

All this talking of hair has got me thinking of a favorite song of our fam.   We are big fans of the comedic YouTube duo of Rhett and Link.  Gah-koe might have mentioned their belly button song on here in the past.  It is worth a gander.  The video that I want to reference today is "My Hair Song."  It is an epic ode to hair that takes an unexpected turn.  You should watch it.  It is good.  Below the video are some pictures of my hair.  Be careful,  it it awesome.

It's pretty tame here, still wet from swimming.

My hair in all its glory.

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