Thursday, September 16, 2010

I Feel the Love

I know my fans love me. The fanmail pours in, delivered to my crib mailbox. I thought this love extended to my immediate circle--my entourage, if you will. One of the inner circle, my sister Gillian, seems not to understand my role in the family. After a long day of shopping and schlepping, me nestled comfortably in my carseat, my sisters beating on each other in their carseats, I hear this question posed:

"When we lose this baby, can we get a girl baby?"

Take a look at that. "When we lose THIS baby." What am I? Don't they realize I am here to stay? Should I be scared to sleep tonight? She loses toys all the time. Did these toys no longer serve her purpose? Were they conveniently "lost?" Lee, if you know of a good bodyguard who protects diminutive gentlemen such as myself, shoot me their digits. I don't want to end up like a My Little Pony, Barbie, or Care Bear--those that have been left behind.
You can't tell, but I'm terrified.

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